never play flip cup with pint glasses
It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
Randomize