i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
I could literally track my booty calls if I ever got knocked up by my parking tickets
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
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