Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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