How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
Randomize
