How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
Randomize
