i realized my work ethic and productivity really improves if i masturbate on my lunch break.
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
Randomize