Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
We were just sitting together and this guy walks up to us and says, "you ladies are drinking too slow", puts a 5 dollar bill on the table and just leaves the bar. Helloooo Taco Bell
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
Randomize
