im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
She's the barista slut.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
My life is a joke. Told everyone last night that they could call me Mrs. McCormick because I'm gonna end up alone with a handle of peach vodka anyways.
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
Randomize
