Plan B is the new Plan A
I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
Yeah, I only wore tennis shoes under the gown. Way cooler than khakis and a shirt, but much more awkward when my parents wanted to go to dinner immediately after the ceremony and my grandmother started to unzip the gown. Stopped her before it was too late, but barely. My dad just rolled his eyes.
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
God, I missed his penis.
Randomize