i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize