It's Friday. Sex?
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
Randomize
