i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
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