Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
She is a social worker. An actual good person trying to save the world. I feel like every time I give her an orgasm God wipes a little smudge off of my shit list.
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
Randomize