I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
Randomize
