Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
Randomize
