the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
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