Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
I woke up and found my apartment really clean, appearantly drunk me couldn't tolerate living there anymore and left sober me a lot of insulting post-its...
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
I have post one night stand depression
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