So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
I intend to get homeless drunk
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
Then you screamed in her face to shut up about thick thighs saving lives because actually they can suffocate people during oral sex
Drunk me is very safety conscious And apparently just as annoyed by her as sober me
Randomize
