i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Randomize
