Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
Randomize