Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
