it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
I left a bag of circus animal cookies in my car all day. they melted together into on giant cookie. this could either be the best or worst thing ever
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
I bet the guy on the treadmill next to me with the noise-canceling headphones wishes he could trade them for smell-canceling noseplugs. Hard to believe that last one did not involve any pants-shitting on my part.
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
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