How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
dream priorities were more important than voting today. don't tell me you wouldn't keep going back to sleep to find out who would win a fight between oprah and godzilla
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
Still not sure if my open-bar-week-long-trip to Cuba is the best idea as a congratulations-for-my-sober-february-challenge. My liver might just explode and give up.
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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