I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Priorities: waking up on your doorstep desperately clutching half a meatball marinara but with no sign of your keys, purse or housemate. Where are you?!
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
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