she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
Randomize
