what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
As shirtless as possible
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
Randomize
