I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am stoned and watching Pocahontas. I am letting the kids eat whatever they want. I am the best babysitter in the whole wide world
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
Whoever was the bastard/bitch/genius who duct taped my keys to my dick so I wouldn't lose them. I hate you.
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
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