his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
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