O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Randomize
