The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
Next year, please remind me not to be at a damn Super Bowl party with screaming children whose parents can't control them. I will sell the little suckers to the fucking circus passing through town.
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
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