She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
Who are you, and why are you in my phone as Elf on the Shelf
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
Randomize
