What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
i already hear my dad disowning me
i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
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