I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
Randomize