Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
people are starting to question the shark bite story
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
Randomize
