he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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