my shit smells like andre
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
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