You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
He was all like, "I think ur the one that got away and I miss you." I replied, "I gave u a hand job once in your hot tub. No need to wax nostalgic about it."
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
Randomize
