Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
Randomize
