I intend to get homeless drunk
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
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