Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
There's an amish chick decked out in amish clothes on a cell phone staring at me.
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
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