I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
ATMs should seriously have built in breathalysers, I would save so much money.
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
Randomize
