I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
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As I type I'm climbing my cousins swingset so I can take a nap inside the slide. Fuck this hangover. I always win.
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
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I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
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