it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
She announced her abortion via fbk
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
Randomize
