Latest life lesson : don't accidentally send an "I nutted on her tramp stamp" text to your tattoo-less girlfriend. Oops.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
Randomize
