I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like having to pee in a condom for my cousin so that he can pass a drug test.
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
I'm just crazy horny about you
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
You left me a really long voicemail saying, "Hey, it's meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee." and then the rest is just loud laughter
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
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