Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
Alive.
So much puke
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize