just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
I'd cum for enchiladas.
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
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