You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
My life is a joke. Told everyone last night that they could call me Mrs. McCormick because I'm gonna end up alone with a handle of peach vodka anyways.
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
Randomize
