You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
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