I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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