So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
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