do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
my drunk step mom just informed me my dad likes reverse cowgirl. Please god kill me.
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
Randomize
