Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I woke up my bed had been moved to the middle of my living room, a hippie was spooning me on one side and a pile of cocaine on the other, did I go through a time warp or are we still in 2012?
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
Randomize